Tag Archives: good deeds

Amazed Where I Found Anti-Semitism in Europe

13 Jul

Our European adventure had the added delight that our daughter and her fiancé came with us for the cruise section of the trip. They live in Israel, so we do not see them very often. In fact we were looking forward to getting to know our future son in law a bit better.

It was wonderful, we would tour with them in the morning and sometimes have lunch in whatever port we were in, but when we returned to the ship each couple was on their own till dinner time.

We were so happy to see their joy. And to see what a very nice young man she chose to marry.

On these tours we met many different people. And since we chose to do many walking tours, there was time to talk and visit. It was interesting and at times enlightening.

I have to be honest, I was concerned about going to Europe, especially France, with all the news about anti-Semitism and anti-Israel activities. Our cruise was originally going to Tunisia, but that port was cancelled. We would have been there the day before the attack on the beach that left 38 dead. And the night before we entered St. Tropez, there was a vicious attack that stunned France as a lone terrorist tried to blow up a factory, but first he killed and beheaded his boss.

So there was some stress on my part as to be aware of what was happening around us. But I still was stunned by where the quiet anti-Semitism actually appeared.

We were touring around Barcelona on a walking tour we booked through our cruise. As we walked through the Gothic town, the old town, a young girl and her mother (from the USA and on our cruise) started a conversation with my daughter and her fiancé. The conversation seemed animated.   So I stepped back to listen.

I was drawn into the conversation, as the teen girl, who had just graduated high school, asked some of her questions.   This girl from a small town in Georgia had never actually spoken to or met Jewish people before. And she had lots of questions, as did her mother.

I tried to be polite. But it got a little difficult after I realized the girl had told my daughter and her fiancé that they were such nice people, and she felt really badly knowing that they were going to Hell since they did not believe in Jesus.

What?!? Her Mom asked me the same question, but about Jewish beliefs. Don’t we think people who don’t believe what we believe will go to Hell?

“NO!” I told her. We believe that as long as people, Jewish or non-Jewish, acted in a good way, did good deeds and followed ethical standards, there was no Hell. Believing in Jesus in our mind had nothing to do with being a good person. And being a good person was the most important.

We told them about the seven Noahide laws that all people have to follow. And as long as a non-Jew followed these laws, they were good. For example you cannot murder or steal.   You cannot eat the flesh of a living creature. You cannot have idolatry.

And then I think we blew her away when we told her that many orthodox Jews believed that Christianity was pagan because they kept graven images of Christ. And seem to worship him. We discussed the Greek influence on Christianity and how this might have made ancient Christians believe that Jesus was the actual son of God. Because in Judaism, this belief is impossible, God has no physical form. We all have the spark of God inside of us, but there is no way we could be the actual child of God. Impossible.

And I pointed out all the “patron saints” we had seen in some of the cathedrals…. actually dead bodies kept in glass coffins. These bodies were dressed and had masks over their faces. And in each place we were told that on their saint day, the coffins were taken down from their alters, carried through town and then placed in the center of the church for all to pay homage to these patron saints.

This is very far from a Jewish version of “have no other God before me.”

The mother stopped trying to tell me about Hell and belief in Jesus. She slowly walked away from me. Perhaps she realized I was not going to change my mind and have an epiphany and believe in Jesus.  Perhaps I had been a bit harsh, but I really do not like to be told I am going to Hell because I don’t believe in Jesus.

So here I was so afraid of anti-Semitism in Europe, when in reality the only anti-Semitism I faced was from other Americans from a small town in Georgia. That was eye opening and somewhat disheartening.

But then I am from Kansas. And just 17 months ago an anti-Semite attacked the Jewish Community in an effort to kill Jews. He instead killed three Christians. If some one is going to Hell it is him and all those who practice hatred.

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Is Lassana Bathily, The French Hero, a Lamed Vovnik?

16 Jan

Since I was a teen, I hoped that I could be a Lamed Vovnik, one of the 36 righteous or just people who keep balance to the world. Of course in Jewish mysticism, the 36 are men. But in my modern mind, I believe that a woman has just as much chance of being one of these 36 special people as any one else.

I first learned of the Lamed Vovnik legend when I read the Holocaust novel, The Last of the Just, by Andre Schwarz-Bart. This book had a tremendous impact on my life. As I read about these two just men and the trials they suffered, I felt a kinship. I felt a need to bring good into the world.

The important belief about the Lamed Vovnik is that these righteous people do not know they are part of this elite group. So I thought, “What if everyone acted as if they were one of the Lamed Vovnik? What if we all practice looking for the good? What if we all do good deeds?”

And that is how I live my life. I try to find something good in everything that happens. Every event is a learning experience. Every one I meet teaches me something.

I focus on the positive, just as I think a righteous person should. I focus on the spark of God that is inside each one of us. I try to do gemulat chasidem, good deeds. I try to work on tikun olam, repairing the world. Just as I think a Righteous Lamed Vovnik would work.

That there are 36 righteous people is important. Each Hebrew letter has a number attached to it. The letters for the number 18 are Het and Yod. These two letters together form the word, Chai, or Life. So many Jewish people present gifts to someone in multiples of 18. There are 36 righteous Lamed Vovnik, which is twice Chai, twice life.

As I watched the events unfolding in France; when I heard of the wonderful deeds of Lassana Bathily, the Muslim worker in the Kosher market, I thought “Could he be a Lamed Vovnik? Could he be bringing balance to the world?”

Think: upstairs in the grocery as Black Muslim man was shooting and killing Jews just because they were Jewish.   He killed four. But two stories below a Black Muslim man was saving Jewish people, hiding them in a freezer. Balance!

Upstairs and man was hiding from the police. Downstairs, a man made the decision to go to the police to tell them about the Jews hiding downstairs. Balance!

He left the building. It took time for the police to believe. And thanks be to God, they did.

With him was a key to the metal gate, as well as in his mind a key to the layout of the store.

Lassana Bathily brought balance, love and righteousness to a horrible situation.

To me he is a Lamed Vovnik, a righteous man. A guttah neshumah, a good soul. And a mensch, a man of high standing.

Baruch Dayan haEmet . May the names of those who perished always be for a blessing. But the name of Lassana Bathily is also a blessing because he provided safety for those who lived. The spark of God within him shines!

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Man Versus Squirrel: Devastation, Disaster, Depression and Destruction of Dreams

18 May

Since the moment we moved into our home 29 years ago, my husband has been in a silent battle with the squirrels that share our land.

Squirrel=proof bird feeders and flower boxes

Squirrel-proof bird feeders and flower boxes

It started simply. We wanted to feed the birds. There are beautiful trees in our backyard, including a mulberry tree, which attracted the birds. But we wanted to help them in the fall and winter. So my husband wanted to put bird feeders on the deck. His first ones were failures. Within minutes of the bird food entering the feeder, they were emptied. Not by birds, but by squirrels. Over a two-year period, my husband tried every type of birdfeeder and squirrel baffle.   Finally he found the bird feeders we have now. The squirrels can no longer get to the bird food. The only problem now is how quickly the birds eat the food!

His second issue with the squirrels revolved around our flower boxes. We have nine flower boxes adorning our deck. Each fall the squirrels bury walnuts in the flower boxes. Then they make a mess digging them up, throwing dirt everywhere. In the spring they often dig up the first flowers we plant. This is annoying, but there is really nothing my husband can do to stop the behavior. So he has learned to live with it, and just replants the flowers.

Issue number three caused quite a battle. Each spring my husband would plant tomatoes.   He would nourish them and watch them grow from tiny yellow flowers into little green tomatoes, until finally they were large and ripe enough to eat. We used to keep them on the vine until they turned red. BIG mistake. The squirrels would pick those red tomatoes, take one bite out of them, and then leave them on the deck right outside our kitchen atrium doors so that we could see the ruined tomato! It was so frustrating.

My husband dealt with in a mature way.   He started planting cherry tomatoes. Even if the squirrels ate a few; even if they took a bite or two, they still were not wasting an entire large tomato. Also, with cherry tomatoes, there were always some for us. Additionally, he started picking the tomatoes before they were totally red, and we let them ripen in the house.

But this final battle has devastated my husband. It has been a pitiful and emotional week.

We found out last year that the ash borer has entered our state. This is disturbing to us because we have eight beautiful ash trees on our property. The word from local arborist is that within five years all the ash trees might be dead. We have already suffered from the destruction of the elm trees. So my husband decided he would take proactive measures. He would start growing trees now.

He first planted a maple from seed. And it grew! He was so excited, he decided on another challenge. He really likes oak trees. So last fall, during one of our walks, he picked up acorns from the ground near an oak tree. He selected the best acorns he could find and brought them home.

After much research, he put these acorns into a zip lock bag with a bit of water, and kept them in our refrigerator all winter. He would check on them, add water when needed, and nurture them.

In mid March, he took the acorns outside and planted them in our flower boxes. He covered each box with the heavy metal tops to our outside tray tables. The trees could get water and light, and had room to grow. The metal screens kept the squirrels out.

Every single day after work, he would go out side to tend and speak to his acorns. And then, miraculously saplings appeared: six baby oak trees. He was so excited. He told all his friends his plans to replace our ash trees with the oak trees that he was growing from seed.

Slowly they grew to about six to eight inches high.   He decided it was time to make a change. They all had leaves on them. So he took them out of the flower boxes, away from their protective metal screens, and planted them in individual, deeper pots.

He continued to visit them each day after work. He was beyond excited.

Yesterday, the routine changed.

He came home and went outside to check on his trees. He was only out for a moment, when he came back in and flopped on a chair. I could see the dejection in his face.

“What’s wrong?” I asked.

“Gone. They are all gone. My trees are gone. “

The squirrels had taken each and every acorn seed; dug them up and ate them. Besides that, they had stripped each little sapling of all of its leaves: leaving devastation, disaster, depression and destruction of dreams.

My husband was beyond comforting. He had nurtured and nourished those saplings. Now all his work was destroyed.

I was so sorry for him. It was the saddest I have seen him in a long time.
“Perhaps you can try again next year,” I said.

“No. I am done. I never thought they would eat them once the saplings were this big. I am done,” he said as he pouted in distress.

“Okay,” I responded. “But at least your maple tree is okay.   Perhaps you can grow more maple trees.”

“No, I don’t have the energy to do this again. I am done,” he replied. “I guess we are just going to have to buy new trees.”

The squirrels have won this battle.

 

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Doing Good Will Make You Feel Good!

4 Jan

I guess the essence of me is to try to make the right choice.  Doing good things for others makes me feel good.  If I am in the grocery store and someone needs a bit more money, I always offer.  When someone is having a bad day, I try to think of something to cheer her/him up.  I am genetically disposed to be happy and help others.  It comes from my parents.

My Dad loved people.  He was president of his synagogue for 11 years.  Anyone who knows synagogues boards, knows it takes a strong, yet kind person to navigate this job.  But Dad loved to schmooze….talk to people about anything.  When he spoke to you, he gave you his undivided attention.  He made people feel good and loved.  Not saying he did not have a temper and could get angry.  But am saying that his overall actions were ones to help others and chat.  He loved to chat.

My Mom was the kindest person ever.  There is nothing else to say.  She opened her home and her heart to many.  For my sister’s friends it is her comment to a friend of theirs who arrived at our home late at night, waking my mom from a sleep.  My Mother’s comment….”Victor, are you hungry.”  Because anyone coming into the house had to be fed, no matter the time or reason.  My Mom possessed the ability to be calm and centered.

She and my Dad were intertwined and committed in their efforts to be good people, to help others and do good in the world.  Being a mensch, a good person; being a “gutah neshuma,” a good soul, was important.

They passed this belief on to their children and grandchildren.

I remember stories about my Mom’s parents. They owned a kosher bakery during the Great Depression.  My Mom would talk about how my grandparents gave people food on credit.  Many years later, people would come to the bakery to pay back because my grandparents had provided them in those tough times.

So doing good things for people, speaking to people, chatting, feeding, helping and just being kind, is what I was taught to do.

Now I am not saying I don’t have a temper and I don’t get angry.  I am my father’s daughter, and my mother’s daughter.  If I see injustice, I get angry.  If I see someone hurting another person, I get angry.  I try not to have useless anger, for me the best thing to do is to do something.  And I try.

The way I try is to attempt the make the world a better place.  For many years, when my children were young, I was a PTA/classroom Mom.  Field trips, parties…I was there.   I served as a PTA president and on the boards of all their school’s PTA/PTO.  I served on standing committees of the school board, providing my input on important issues.

As my children aged, my volunteering grew.  My son wanted to volunteer at the local animal shelter, Wayside Waifs.  For the first two years, I had to go with him.  It was a great time to bond and a great place to help.  My daughter and I volunteered together for NCJW and at our synagogue.

All the helping and volunteering made me feel so much better. Helping others brings you out of yourself.  I highly recommend it to all.  Feeling badly?  Find someone to help.  There are so many in need.

I have tried to do one good thing every day of my life.  Sometimes it is volunteering for an organization.  Sometimes it is donating money for a good cause.  Sometimes it is organizing a program.  If a neighbor or a friend needs help, I am there. (Just don’t ask me to cook for you.  That is not something I do well.)   It makes me feel so good to help someone else.

I read somewhere that it takes more muscles to frown than to smile. And if you smile, you actually feel better.  So to all I say, doing something nice is like smiling, when you do it, you will feel so much better.

Have a great day!

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