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My Genealogy Research Makes a Difference To A Distant Cousin

23 Apr

When I started my genealogy research, I did my research and wrote my blogs just for my siblings and immediate family.  Over time, I included my cousins on my blog posts.  And then it just snowballed.  I realized that by posting them on Facebook, specifically on Tracing the Tribe group, I might connect with other more distant relatives.  And it happened.  I have had people help me with my research who are not related. I am in touch with distant cousins including Evan, who has been an immense help in making connections.  I have met some of these cousins in person.  And my understanding of my family increases with each new contact.

This blog is different.  In this instance, I discovered that the information I had from speaking with my grandmother years ago helped solve the family mystery of a women who is actually my third cousin, our grandmother’s were first cousins.

It started with an email from Evan. (He really does a great job keeping in touch with all the cousins) He connected me with a distant cousin named Sherry, the granddaughter of a woman named Esther who was born about 1897/1898.  He said she was part of my branch of the family and thought I could help.  I could.

A number of years ago, I wrote a blog about my grandmother entitled “Too Many Esthers” (see blog below) and “Updated Esther “(see blog below).  My Grandma Esther was one of 5 or 6 first cousins all named for their maternal grandmother, all named Esther, all born around the same time. All were given nicknames.  My grandmother was known as Curly Esther.

Sherry wrote back to Evan and me: (She has given me permission to write this blog, I have edited her emails for privacy and brevity.).  “Thank you for contacting me!  I had trouble with my grandmother, and who her parents truly were.  There were so many unanswered questions and there are no living family members in my close family that know anything more than I do.  I got pretty frustrated and sort of put it on the back burner.  I would be really interested in what you found out!”

I immediately responded: “It’s nice to be reconnected. I am the granddaughter of another Esther born in 1898.  I have been researching the family for years. In late 1970s I sat down with my Grandma and got the names of all of her mother’s siblings. The children of Elka/Esther Lew and Victor/Avigdor Wolf. Here are two of my blogs that will lead back to some of my research and introduce you to the family. The attached photo is our great great grandparents Esther and Victor Wolf(f).

Actually, I knew immediately who her grandmother had to be, which is why I sent her the blogs about the Esthers.  There was one cousin known as Meshugannah Esther.  Her mother Chamka came to the USA pregnant with three children.  Her husband had passed away before she came.  After their daughter, Esther, was born and weaned, she was given to a different sister, Sarah, who could not have children, to raise as her own.  To make things more confusing, Chamka was known as Anna in the USA, but her Hebrew name was Nechama.  Her family called her only Chamka/Chamky.

I must say I was truly happy to receive a reply from Sherry.  Her response filled me with joy to know that my research and pictures helped her.  Here is an edited version of her response.

“Wow!  I am so overwhelmed and thrilled with this connection.  I was getting so frustrated with trying to figure out my grandmother’s story and had no one to ask.  

I did hear that “grandma didn’t find out until the day she was engaged that her aunt was her mother and her mother was her aunt”.  So I knew that there was information that I was missing in order to fill in the blanks.  

“Meshuganah Esther moved in with my family when I was 10 years old. We lived next door to Aunt Lenore and her family.  Grandma was married 5 times!  She felt she needed to do that in order for her to care for her children. My grandmother passed in June of 1993.

“Ellen, you spoke of the cousins’ club meetings.  I remember them although I think I spent most of the time hiding behind my mother’s skirt…

“I actually gasped out loud when I opened the picture of Esther and Victor Wolf.  I have that picture and I had no idea who they were.

Thank you, dear cousins.  This is a gift.”

My initial response to this was just as excited. I was elated that I could help.

“I am so glad that you were able to make connections about the family through my blogs. I am so glad that you have that photo as well, and now know who it is.  It is amazing to have photos of great grandparents, but great great grandparents is really special. 

“Did you see the picture of Chamka and Lenore?  I am not sure which blog it is in.

I can understand a bit why she wasn’t told which sister was her mother.  But I am sure it was a big shock at the time. It was one of those open secrets that everyone knows but does not discuss.”

Since she did not have nor seen the photo of her great grandmother Chamka with her granddaughter Lenore, I sent her the photo and the information that was written on the back. “Tante Chamky and Lenore. Lenore was Meshuggana Esther’s daughter. Esther was raised by Tante Sarah, but was really Chamky’s daughter.”

I am currently looking for the photo so I can send her it for her family records.

Thanks to Tracing the Tribe, over the years, I have connected with a number of cousins.  But this connection honestly made me immensely happy.  

Too Many Esthers!
Updated Esthers
The Descendants of Esther (Lew) and Victor (Avigdor) Wolff/Wolf

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 Finding Answers About My Paternal Great Grandmother

17 Apr

In Ashkenazi Jewish custom we name our children for those beloved family members who have passed away. I was always told that I was named after three of my great grandmothers:

Chava was for my maternal grandfather’s mother, Chava, who was murdered in the Shoah.

Sara was for my maternal grandmother’s mother Sara/Sura, who died in the 1920s in Poland, and for my paternal grandfather’s mother as her name was Sarah as well.

I knew about my two maternal great grandmothers, because there were family stories about them.  But I knew nothing about my paternal great grandmother even though she  lived in the United States and is buried in New York.  I have recently realized there is more to the story about her and my name. 

I have been searching for information about my paternal great grandmother  for years.  The first real clue was when we first saw a photo of her about five years ago.  We did not even know we had one!  But my first cousin was searching through her family’s old photos and discovered one of her with my uncle.  (See blog below.)

More information followed when my distant cousin, Evan, who is a great researcher, found my grandparent’s marriage license.  They were married in January of 1923.  It contained my great grandmother’s maiden name which we never knew: Ritt.

Evan also found a puzzle piece for me when he found her death certificate, which was packed with information. The final link was when Beth David Cemetery in Elmont, New York, where she was buried on January 29, 1938, sent me a photo of her matzevah (tombstone).

I now can tell my family more about my mysterious great grandmother, who I now know is named Chaya Sarah, so close to my own name of Chava Sara, that I think I was bound to have this name.

My great grandmother did not have an easy life.  She gave birth to 11 children. Eight survived to adulthood.  She lost her oldest daughter, Celia, to swine flu when she was in her 20s.  Her oldest son, Samuel, was mentally ill and spent most of his adult life institutionalized.  She and her husband, Abraham, were divorced in the 1930s.  A very unusual occurrence for a Jewish woman, well for any woman, in that time period.

My Great Grandma Sarah died on January 28, 1938, from cancer of the panaceas at Jewish Hospital of Brooklyn, when she was 68 years old.  My grandfather, then the oldest living child signed the death certificate and made the arrangements.

I have three thoughts about this information.  First, the line through my grandfather is cancer free.  But I have since learned that the line through his youngest sibling, Jacob, was not as kind. We all thought Jacob had disappeared after he moved to England when my dad was a child. But in fact he died when he was in his fifties from cancer, as did his son Rufus.  The cancer gene followed them. (See blog below.)

Second, I think I know why I was named for her.  She died in late January.  Years later, I was born in late January.  It made sense.  Finally, I am currently close to her age when she died.  And that touches me that I found out now.

I know that she was born about 1870, in France.  That she and her parents lived in France surprised me. But her father and mother, Hirsh and Flora Ritt, were from Poland.  So I think they were in transit from Poland to the USA when she was born.  I have no proof, but it seems right.  I also know that her father died before 1892 because my grandfather was named for him. Zvi Hirsh.  I now know that she was about 22 when she had her third child, and her other children were toddlers when my grandfather was born.

She died when my Dad was just 9 years old.  He really did not have many memories of her or information.  But now we know her name and also the names of my great great grandparents: Chaya Sarah Ritt, the daughter of Hirsh Zvi and Flora Ritt.  We now can add their memories to our family.

I want to thank the personnel of Beth David Cemetery. I now have photos of the graves of four of my great grandparents.

The Gift of a Photo Becomes a Gift of Genealogy
Did Great Aunt Celia Die From the Spanish Flu?
Update About My Grandfather’s Mysterious Brother Jacob

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Great Aunt Minnie was Basically Another Grandma

17 Mar

I have written about my Grandmother’s two brothers who died relatively young: one as baby, the other in his early 60s.  I did not know them that well.  I decided I should write more about my Aunt Minnie, my grandmother’s older sister, because she was important in our lives. 

Aunt Minnie is in many of my blogs because she was always with us.  When my grandmother moved to Co-op City in the Bronx in the late 1960s, Aunt Minnie moved to Co-op City in the Bronx, in an apartment directly under my grandparents.

When my grandparents came up for the summer to the Catskills, Aunt Minnie came up for the summer to the Catskills and stayed in the same bungalow with my grandparents.  I honestly do not know how they did that.  My grandparents had the bedroom, Aunt Minnie slept on trundle bed in the kitchen area.

Every holiday, Aunt Minnie was there.  She was basically another grandmother. She gave us gifts for our birthdays and Hanukkah, $5 each.  She hugged us, she scolded us sometimes, and she told us what to do, just like my two other grandmothers.

My father was the youngest boy. He is the lower right.

Aunt Minnie’s married in 1918. Her husband, Uncle Eli or Uncle Al, died before I was born, in 1949.  They had two sons, who were older than my uncle and my dad. But, in reality, the four boys, and then my aunt who was the youngest, were basically raised together.  Part of the reason is that my great grandparents lived with my grandparents.  My grandfather and great grandfather worked together in a tailor shop they owned. (See blog below.) Family gatherings were always at their apartment in the Bronx.

With all that togetherness, what amazed me is that one of Aunt Minnie’s sons, Victor,  married and moved to New Orleans.  He left the fold.  The other, David, met a lovely woman in England during World War Two and brought into the family a British war bride who was not Jewish, but by the time I can remember she was a loved member of the family.   In our family these two men were known as Cousin Victor and Cousin David.  They weren’t uncles, but they were not to be called by their first name alone.  And their wives were also referred to as cousin, before their first names.

Cousin David had two children, who I won’t name because they are still living.  However, I will tell you one story about Cousin David.  He had a very bad stutter growing up and into his adulthood.  When he was anxious he would stutter then slowed his speech till it stopped.  As a child, I had a bad speech impediment.  I started meeting with a speech therapist before I even started school and continued through eighth grade.  This made me very shy and wary of speaking to strangers.  Cousin David was my advocate.  At every family event we both attended he would stop to talk to me to give me coping skills which I still use today.  I am very adept in the middle talking to switch words because a word I can say today, I might now be able to say tomorrow.  I have a thesaurus of words sitting in my mind  waiting for an emergency.  Cousin David’s advice has been well used over the decades.

Another little Cousin David story.  My father is also named for the same person David was named for. But my dad had a different first name that began with D, only his Hebrew name was David.  This goes back to my Grandma Esther’s dislike of being one of five girl first cousins named Esther. (See blog below.)

Cousin Victor and his wife lived in New Orleans and had three children.  I did not know them at all. I remember meeting them at my wedding, when they came up for the celebration.  My Aunt Minnie had died about two years before when she was in her early 80s, and I think the cousins decided that they needed to celebrate together not just go to funerals.  One spring break we took our children to New Orleans and spent time with Cousin Victor and met his son and his family.  Once again, I won’t name them.

 But I will say that Cousin Victor’s son died late last year.  He and I kept in touch over the years as I sent him updates on my family discoveries.  When my daughter went through a pregnancy crisis, he was so supportive as his daughter had gone through a similar crisis several years previously.  He spent hours on the phone with me one day helping me sort through all the emotions this caused.  I always enjoyed my contact with him.  And I will miss him.  We often would say how much our dads and grandmothers would like knowing that we continue to keep in touch.

Aunt Minnie and my Grandma Esther are forever entwined in my mind and in my heart.

Sisters: Grandma Esther and Aunt Minnie

https://zicharonot.com/2015/10/10/12-delancey-street-and-my-family/

https://zicharonot.com/2017/11/16/too-many-esthers/

https://zicharonot.com/2024/02/25/uncle-sammy-presents-a-surprise/

Baby Jacob is Found

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An Unexpected ‘Grave’ Mystery

3 Mar

With the uptick in anti-Semitic events, with masked college students attacking Jewish students at colleges, with a Hamas murderous pogrom in Israel, I am still amazed when events from the Shoah are revealed in present day. I feel like I am in a time warp.  Reading about the events at the UC Berkley campus and at the same time reading an email from a distant cousin telling me about a mass grave found in Poland that contains members of my extended family.  Don’t college students learn anything about history? 

My newest journey started with a email from a distant cousin concerning the Holocaust and my family. I get unusual requests now and then because I have been the family historian, trying to document all the family who were murdered during the Shoah.  A task I realize is virtually impossible with all large number of people in my family who were murdered. 

My distant cousin received a letter through JewishGen’s Family Finder.  Her great aunt, who I keep in contact with, suggested she send the email to me.

Her email contained a series of emails between two people in Europe that forced my brain back in time to all that my maternal family had suffered so many decades ago during the horrors of the Shoah.

The first was from a retired baker in London who had been contacted by a researcher who wanted information about a family named Brenner who were murdered by the Nazis and whose bones were recently found in a mass grave and in accordance with state law were re-interred in a Catholic cemetery.

His mother was born Kornbluth and her father was born in Mielec, Poland, where many Kornbluth’s were living when the Nazis invaded. They believed the bones were those of a woman whose maiden name was Kornbluth; her married name was Brenner.

My family was from Mielec and its surrounding small towns.  I have written about the destruction of the Jewish population in this city and its surrounding in other blogs.  Brenner is one of the names in my family. Which made me think that I could have a connection with this grave.  Although the last name Kornbluth is familiar, I wasn’t entirely sure of the connection to us.  But I kept reading.

The baker then include emails from a representative of the Zapomniane Foundation that deals with locating and commemorating the graves of the Holocaust victims. He found the baker through JewishGen Family Finder.



“I represent the Zapomniane Foundation that deals with locating and commemorating the graves of the Holocaust victims (zapomniane.org or our profile on FB). I’m currently researching the case of the Brenner family murdered in 1942 and buried in a mass grave near Mielec. According to what I have learned so far among the victims probably were Lazar and Sara Brenner. Her maiden name was Kornbluth. Before the war they lived in a village called Hyki (today it is called Sarnow). They were killed together with their children and Sara’s brother. Would you happen to know this story and/or have any information about Sara Brenner nee Kornbluth?

Sincerely
A N”

Then came more information from the Zapomniane Foundation:
“ Here is the story of how I have learned about the Brenner family:

Two years ago I went to Czajkowa (a village near Mielec) to see the location of a place where the Brenner family (seven people) was killed and buried in August 1942.My guide was Robert P. who told me the story of his aunt Anna P. Anna’s real name was Ryfka Amsterdam she was Jewish, converted to catholicism before the war and married Andrzej P, Robert’s relative and became Anna P. The Brenner family were the relatives of Anna/Ryfka: perhaps Ryfka’s sister with husband and children and possibly Ryfka’s (and Sara’s?)brother. There are no names, only the last name of the father of the family i.e Brenner.”

Well now we are getting closer to my family, since Amsterdam is my grandfather’s last name. I know that any one named Amsterdam is definitely somehow related to me. This is the first time ever that I have heard about a family member who converted to Catholicism before the war.  But to be honest, if someone left the family to marry outside of the faith, it was probably not discussed. 

What the email says next really touched my soul! I could not image how this young man would have felt when he dug up the grave.


“The gravesite of the Brenner family was partially destroyed in 2003 by an excavator. Obviously the grave itself has never been marked, it was just a hole in the ground.  As a result the bones from this grave were taken by the police and buried in an anonymous grave in Tuszów Narodowy catholic cemetery. Ironically the guy who worked with the excavator and dug out the bones was the grandson of Ryfka Amsterdam/Anna P. He was interrogated by the police in 2003. Anna/Ryfka had three children, her son born in 1950 is still living in Mielec.”

Next shock!  A non-Jewish descendant of Rikva/Anna born just a few years before me, still lives in Mielec.  They stayed there even after all her Jewish relatives were murdered. I cannot understand that reality. Could you comfortably walk the streets of a city, see the houses of your relatives, know that they were murdered and that others were living in their homes?  Would you ever feel safe?

Not only that, it was Anna’s grandson who accidentally dug up the grave of people who might be his great aunt and uncle and their children, his cousins.  I could almost see this as a movie.  Could this truly be happening?  But yes, it was and it is.  So now he has not only dug up a grave 80 years after they were buried, but it is his family buried there.  I really have no words.

The researcher  continued:

“I found the information about Chaim Brenner via the Holocaust Survivor Program. Thus I knew the names of his parents and their fate that fits the story I know from the Polish archives:

Czajkowa
Aug. 15, 1942
Captured and shot by German police, beginning w/ oldest family member; gendarme Franiszek Wojtas identified as likely shooter; family did not report to ghetto and remained in hiding for approx. 3 mos.; hid in forest and empty home of Kamuda; group consisted of two families; relatives of prewar converts to Christianity, Amsterdams, who survived war in same village

So my big questions are who was buried in the grave destroyed by the excavator 20 years ago and how can we commemorate them.”


The retired baker then tells my cousin that he contacted her because she has a Nathan Amsterdam in her family tree who told Yad VaShem about the death of a niece with the maiden name of Kornbluth. Could she help? Which is how I became part of this Nazi murder/grave mystery.

I knew I really could not help, but I felt like I had to say something I emailed both the baker and the Zapomniane Foundation.  Here is a shortened version of the email I sent.

Your question about the grave and the Brenner/Amsterdam/Kornbluth murders, was sent to me as I have become an Amsterdam family researcher for a while now.

She knew I would be interested in this question.

Unfortunately, I do not know who was buried in the unmarked grave.  Not much help I know. But I can tell you that there are many named Nathan Amsterdam in our family.  My cousin’s great grandfather and my grandfather were both were named Nathan Amsterdam and they were cousins who were born in Austria/Poland in the Mielec area.

The family in Meilec and the surrounding area had four main family names: Amsterdam, Feuer, Brenner and Hollander. The family is Cohanim. Hence the names Feuer/ FIre and Brenner/ Burner. The other names came because the family did go from Spain to Portugal to Amsterdam and then a group moved to Austria/Poland. There was much intermarriage between people with these four surnames.

Almost the entire family who remained in Europe died during the Shoah. Mielec was one of the first areas that the Nazis made judenfrei. Only a few cousins survived. They are all gone now.  One moved to the USA, two went to England and two moved to Israel.

Here is the info on the family that survived and moved to England. Perhaps you might find a descendant. I met them in the early 1960s when they came to the USA to visit the family here.

Zacheriah and Elka had seven children.  Only three survived the Shoah.  Gimple Feuer married and moved to England.  They had four children.  (I then named the four children who they might be able to reach. I am not publishing their names here as they might still be alive.)

Lazar Feuer also lived in England after the war, I never met him.  He had three children: (I named these three as well.)

I am sorry I cannot tell you or the researcher there who exactly is buried in that grave.  But I can tell you that several hundred members of the family were murdered in the Shoah in many different places and methods.  But as the names were Brenner and Amsterdam, I can tell you that they are my distant relatives and that the men were probably Cohanim.”

Because I think finding a way to commemoriate these people is important, I am posting this on Tracing the Tribe Facebook page to see if anyone else has a connection that could help.

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Uncle Sammy Presents A Surprise!!

25 Feb

Of my paternal grandmother’s two brothers, I must admit I liked Uncle Sammy more. He was always jovial and happy.  But he also had a bit of scandal attached to him.  Whenever he was around or came to family events, my grandma would get a bit agitated, waiting for something to happen.

I know she was not great friends with his wife, who I always assumed was his second wife.  I even wrote about her a previous blog. (See blog below.).  But Uncle Sammy always had a smile.  He was the youngest sibling and just seemed the most relaxed. Being around him made me happy.  But then I also loved my great uncle Lenny, who taught me how to bet on the horses. (See blog below)

Uncle Sammy worked as a bus driver from the Port Authority in New York City.   I actually remember one time waiting for a bus with my Mom at the Port Authority Bus Terminal, a giant bus hub in Manhattan, when I actually saw my great Uncle.  It was such a surprise.  He beeped his horn and stopped his bus for a moment and to say hello to us. I was so excited!

I vaguely remember that he eventually became a supervisor at the Port Authority.  But, although I can find a docuent stating he was a bus driver, I have been unable tto confirm the promotion. When I ask my older cousins, they do not remember much about him at all. I might have been the only fascinated by him.

My Uncle Sammy died young, in his early 60s.  I do not know the exact date, but I was probably 13 or 14. So around 1968 – 1969.

I knew he was married at least two times.  He married his first wife, Adele, in 1932, when he was in his 20s.  They had one daughter, Vesta.  (Thanks to her unusual name, it is easy to find him!)  I never knew Adele, although I did meet Vesta once or twice.  She was 20 years older than me.  When I knew Uncle Sammy, he was married to Sylvia, who I assumed was his second wife.

But my view of Uncle Sammy changed just a little while searching for my Grandmother’s young brother who died as a toddler.  (See blog below.).  While searching for Jacob, EW (my distant cousin and excellent researcher) found a startling fact about Uncle Sammy.  It seems he had a third wife!!! 

When he was 43 years old, in the 1950 census, he had a wife named Gloria who was 14 years younger, jsut 29.  His then 16-year-old daughter was living with them.   But this  entry in the 1950 census is important because it confirms that he was a bus driver.

I have not been able to find any other documents about Uncle Sammy, not his death certificate or where he is buried.  Although I do know that his widow Sylvia remained in Kew Gardens after he died.  She stayed in touch with our family and came to family events.

EW did find one more item for me.  Uncle Sammy’s daughter, Vesta Jean got married in 1969. He told me that she is listed as Vesta Goldman on her marriage license   But as you can see here, in the announcements she took her stepfather’s last name, Saltzman. 

I think Uncle Sammy had passed away by then.  Because I cannot imagine she would have written her dad out of her marriage if he was still alive. But I do not know for sure, as here it says that she was married by a Reverend. And marrying someone who was not Jewish might have been an issue, because I never knew that Vesta had married.  And I do not think anyone in the Goldman family went to the wedding. As far as I know, Vesta and her husband Clifford, did not have children. 

I hope I can one day find where Uncle Sammy is buried. With the name Samuel Goldman, he is difficult to find. There were many Samuel Goldmans in New York City. EW checked the Bialystoker lists, as other members of my family are listed there. But no luck. With this blog I hope to keep Uncle Sammy’s memory alive for our family.

Grandma Thelma Knows What She Knows

https://zicharonot.com/2015/02/18/the-littlest-gambler-learning-about-horse-races-in-the-catskills/

https://zicharonot.com/2024/01/12/baby-jacob-is-found/

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Baby Jacob is Found

12 Jan

I recently expanded my spiritual care volunteering to include women who have lost a pregnancy or an infant.  (See blog below.). While I was taking seminars and webinars to learn about my new role, I was reminded that my grandmother always mentioned her brother Jacob, who died when he was a child, whenever she listed off her siblings.  She always told me that she was one of five; four living and one who died.

I always assumed that Jacob, who had been named for his paternal grandfather, Yankel, my great great grandfather, had died as a young boy.  Old enough for my grandmother to remember him.   I did not know how Jacob died or how old he was when he died.  My grandmother spoke about him as if she knew him.  So I figure he was a child of 5 or 6 when he passed. 

Now I know she did not know him at all. That the memory she had of him came from her mother, my great grandmother. I can imagine that whenever someone asked her how many children she had, she always remembered and counted Jacob. How could a mother forget her own child? I know now that you never forget the pain of losing a loved one, especially a child. What you can do is to learn to live with it and move forward while remembering.

Jacob has been on my mind lately.  So recently, when my distant cousin, Evan W., who is the best genealogy researcher I know started texting documents one day, I realized I could find out what happened.  Or rather Evan could.  I asked if he was again at the Mormon Center doing research.  He was.  That was fortuitous for me.  I told him about Jacob.  Honestly, within minutes I had my answer. I was stunned.  And when I looked at the dates on the death certificate, I realized I was looking at documents registered almost exactly 126 years ago.

(Once again thank you to Evan and to Tracing The Tribe group that has helped me so much over the years with my mysteries.)

Evan found first that In the 1900 census the family can be found living in the same apartment building as one of my great grandmother’s sister and her family.  Louis and Ray have two living children, two girls one born in 1895 and one in 1898 (my grandmother.). But it also indicated that she had three children, only two living. 

Jacob died when he was just over one year old on January 2, 1898, at 4 pm in the afternoon, with the document registered on January 3 (or 8). He was acutely ill for four days, with the doctor making house calls from December 30 until Jacob died on the second.

I cannot imagine starting a new year with the death of a son.   She must have been devasted.  I can imagine that her sister, who lived in the same building, was there for her.  Jacob’s older sister, my great aunt, was only about 18 months old. My grandmother was not even born when he died.  In fact, she was born 11 months later in November 0f 1898.  So I know for sure she was not remembering him at all.  She was repeating what her mother always said. “I have five children, four living and one, Jacob, who passed away.”

The death certificate states that the cause of death was Simple Meningitis, but there was a contributing factor. Poor Jacob had hydrocephalus.  This is a condition of extra cerebrospinal fluid on the brain.  Now a baby who has this gets a shunt put in that releases the fluid, so that the child survives.

In fact on KidsHealth website it says: “Children often have a full life span if hydrocephalus is caught early and treated. Infants who undergo surgical treatment to reduce the excess fluid in the brain and survive to age 1 will not have a shortened life expectancy due to hydrocephalus.”

But for Jacob this was not an option.  His short life was probably difficult for all as the fluids put pressure on his skull and brain.  My husband, who is a pediatrician, said that meningitis is common with those who have hydrocephalus.  I can imagine the toll his condition had on the family.  I assume that his parents knew that he would not live a long life.  Jacob was unfortunately doomed to die. 

My great grandmother had three children after Jacob died, my grandmother and two more sons.  These four children really grew up not knowing Jacob at all.  But their mother kept his memory alive.   Jacob is buried at Washington Cemetery in New York, where my great grandparents are buried.  I am hoping to find his grave. Although Evan told me that often babies had no stones.

My great grandparents married on January 28, 1894.  I am writing this blog in memory of their 130th wedding anniversary, and the loss they had right before their fourth anniversary in 1898, when Jacob died. By writing this memory I hope that I am continuing my great grandmother’s wish to keep his memory alive.

Expanding my Spiritual Care Volunteer Work

https://kidshealth.org/

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The Mystery of Marjorie: Missed Opportunity Realized a Bit Too Late

13 Jul

Sometimes serendipity does not go the way you want it to go!

Over 20 years ago, a woman called our home and left a message.  My husband’s father had passed away, and the obituary mentioned his mother’s name as well.  She had died 20 years before at the young age of 59 from cancer.  The caller said that she had grown up with my mother-in-law in Leavenworth, Kansas, and really wanted to speak to my husband about his Mom.

My father-in- law died on September 1, 2001.  Ten days later was 9/11.  The message got deleted and forgotten for quite a while.  Life seemed so bizarre in the days and months following the terrorist attack. With most of my family in the New York City area, I was suffering with the rest of the country in a state of shock.  My father-in-law’s death faded into the background. But we were feeling the emotions of that loss as well as the loss of security we all felt in the USA.

Sometime after the initial phone call, I remembered the call.  I told my husband that someone named Marjorie had called about his Mom.  I no longer had the phone number or the message.  But I knew that somewhere in our Kansas City Jewish community this person existed.  And then it faded away again. But every once in a while, if I met an older woman named Marjorie I would ask if she grew up in Leavenworth.

A month ago a friend’s mother passed away.  Although I am friends with this woman, I did not know her mother.  I never met her. I never spoke to her.  But I wish I did because in her obituary, I found out her name was Marjorie and that she grew up in Leavenworth, Kansas.  Furthermore, she and my mother-in-law were born just six weeks apart.  It had to be the missing Marjorie who had called us so many years before.  She had lived to the amazing age of 97.  Almost 40 years longer than my mother-in-law.

I could not go to the shiva or funeral, but I emailed my friend and apology and told her the story of my mother-in-law and this woman who I now believed was her mother. She immediately wrote back that she had a box of memorabilia from her Mom and that she would look through it.  I know it gave her something to do, an escape from the funeral activities.  It was a search for answers.  Was her Mom my mother-in-law’s friend?

The answers came quickly. My friend emailed me a page from the Leavenworth High School yearbook.  They were in the same grade.  Then articles from local newspapers showing both of their names.  There was not much we could do then, as I was leaving town. 

I told her that I would take her to lunch when I came back because I could not go to shiva.  And she agreed to bring some of the papers.  What a lunch.  I saw my mother in law’s high school graduation program.  I saw the program from her confirmation at the Leavenworth synagogue.  Four girls were confirmed together.  My mother-in-law, my friend’s mother and her sister, as well as one other girl.   My friend told me that somewhere she has a photo from the confirmation.  I cannot wait to see it. She was excited as well because now she can put a name on each of the girls.

I found out that sometimes my mother-in-law used a different spelling for her name.  Sometimes it was Leona May, which is what we all believed was the spelling.  And sometimes it was Leona Mae.  Did she use that when she wanted to be a bit more fancy?  Who knows.  But I found it endearing.  Legally it was Leona May.

I found out in 1993 the class held their 50 high school reunion.  Of course, she was not there since she had died in 1984.  But her sister, Barbara, submitted a biography about what she did after high school, her family and of her death from cancer.  It was somewhat emotional to see this message from Barbara.

I so wish I had found Marjorie years ago.  I wish we could have gone through her box of memories together with her daughters and my husband.  But I am still glad I have finally found out who she was in the community.  Also that my friend and I can enjoy this link between our families.

Seeing Grandma In Poland before 1922

26 Dec

While in Israel, my daughter and I went to visit my cousin and her family.  Sara and I are just one month a part in age, but she is actually my mother’s first cousin.  Sara was the child of my grandmother’s youngest brother.  My two uncles and their wives, two sisters, escaped Poland by running to Russia.  Probably not the best choice. But since they were tailors, they were able to survive.  In any case, they did not have any children till the war was over and they were out of Europe.

Sara and I became pen pals when we were 11.  Sara grew up in Australia, and then moved with her family to Israel in 1966. That is when we started writing to each other and we have been in touch ever since. 

During this visit, when the young people were visiting, Sara pulled out some old photo albums.  Most of the photos I had seen before.  But some from Europe and Australia I had not seen.  One in particular caught my attention because I noticed my grandmother as a girl.  And I realized that this was the only photo I had ever seen of my grandmother in Europe before she came to the USA at age 16.

There are two other girls in the photo.  The back of the photo says “Isaac’s three sisters.”  And there were three sisters.  My grandmother Tova/Taube/Thelma was the oldest.  Esther was the middle child and Malcha was the baby. Esther was about six years younger than my grandmother, who was able to bring her to America along with my great grandfather in 1936.  (See blog below.)

But the question is: are these really the three sisters?  The notation was made by my great aunt, not my great uncle.  Sara doesn’t know for sure.  I got in touch with my mother’s other first cousin, who is 15 years older than us.  I thought she might know.

She agrees that the girl on the right is my grandmother.  That is not in doubt.  My grandmother never changed! But although the girl on the left looks like my Tante Esther, she seems too close in age to my grandmother in this picture.  Grandma was born in 1906, Tante Esther in 1912.  These two girls seem to be the same age.    The girl in the middle could be Malcha.  But supposedly Esther is only three years older than Malcha.  Oy Vey.

Then we thought, this is my grandmother on the right, so perhaps it is  her best friend and first cousin, Tova Malcha on the left. They were the same age.  We then think,  sitting on the ground is grandma’s sister, my great aunt Malcha.  Then Esther is not in the picture. 

The caption could be wrong?

We do not know.  And I doubt that we will ever know, because everyone who might know has passed away.

In the meantime, I am just excited about finding a photo of my grandmother when she was a girl in Poland.  As my cousin said, no matter what, it is great treasure.

The Rosh Hashannah Card Has A Story
This Jacket is a Survivor!

Finally Finding The Three Rosenberg Sisters

12 Sep

I have had such a mystery. I have found out much about my great grandparents Abraham and Sarah Rosenberg. I know that they got divorced. I know that they lost one daughter, Celia, to the Spanish Flu and a son, Samuel, to a mental institution. (See blogs below.) They were their two oldest children. Other children in this family disappeared from our family connections.  I have been trying to find them all for over 20 years.

In order, the children were Samuel, Celia, my grandfather Harry/Hersh, Jacob/Jack, Bertha, Edith/Esther, Hady/Hatti/Hanna, Minnie/Muriel.  I have found Jacob in England, where he moved.  I have found out some about Muriel.  I did know my Aunt Hady when I was a small child.  (See blogs below.) But Bertha and Edith/Ethel were still a mystery.

At several times in their marriage, in which my great grandmother had 12 pregnancies and eight live births, my great grandparents had major issues, they eventually divorced, which in the 1920s was uncommon.  There was a period of time when their three middle daughters did not live with them: Bertha, Ethel/Edith and Hattie/Hady/Hannah. At first, I could not even find them anywhere in the census reports.  But then I posted a request for help on the Tracing the Tribe group

The mystery starts in 1900.  I found the family in Kings County, New York census. There were two girls are named Rose and Esther.  Rose is a name that was often given to a daughter in this family and then changed!  (See blog below).  And I believe Esther became Ethel/Edith.

In the 1905 New York census, none of these three girls were living with their parents.  But another Tracing the Tribe member (Sherri V) found Bertha living with a family headed by Lous and Rose Salomon/Solomon. She is listed as their niece. The list of family includes Benny, 22; Rebeka, 20; Moses, 19; William, 18; David, 16; Sadie, 24; Esther 13; and. Bertha 11.  Esther is not listed as a Rosenberg, but I have to wonder if she is Ethel.

I found the family again in both the 1910 and 1920 census.  This time all three girls were living with Louis and Rose Solomon and their sons Bernard, Morris, William and David. The three girls are listed as Bertha Rosenberg, 17, Ethel Solomon 15, and Hanna Solomon, 13. in 1910.  Later in 1920, Louis is living with William, and David, along with Bertha Rosenberg 24 and Ethel Solomon 23.

Although Ethel and Hanna are listed as Solomon, it is possible that they actually used these names when living with their aunt and uncle. These three girls seemed to go back and forth between their parentsmother and the Solomon family.

I posted the above information along with these questions to the Tracing the Tribe group: How is the Solomon family related to my great grandfather, Abraham Rosenberg, or to his wife, Sarah Ritt/Writ/Rith/Rosenberg. They lived in Kings County New York.

Kaye H. was kind enough to do some research for me.  She posted:  According to their marriage record, Rose’s maiden name was Rosenberg. Her parents were Jacob Rosenberg and Rhoda Anna Cohen (I think, it’s a bit hard to read). Does that line up with Abraham’s parents? https://a860-historicalvitalrecords.nyc.gov/view/7950837”

Well that was a very good question.  I did not know the names of my grandfather’s parents.  He was born in Russia, and he was married in Europe.  I have been unable to find his parent’s names.  I have my great grandmother’s death certificate, so I know her parent’s names, but have been unable to find anything about my great grandfather.

My family lived entirely in Kings County once they came to the USA. But there is a rumor that my grandfather left the family and moved to Seattle.  A few years ago, when I was in Seattle, I went to the public library to see if I could find any records of him.  With the help of tw o lovely librarians, I found a few Abraham Rosenbergs, but no one that really matched my great grandfather.  I am thinking that I was looking too early.  I assumed in went around 1900. But now I think if he went it was closer to 1905.

My great grandfather was born about 1861.  Rose/Rosa, who is perhaps his sister, married Louis on January 4, 1882 in New York City. She was 17 or 18 when she got married.  Making her birth about 1865 and she was born in Russia. Rosa/Rose signed her marriage license with an X. Louis, her hsuband , was educated enough to sign his full name in Hebrew.

Because Bertha is listed as a niece, I have to believe that Rose is Abraham’s sister.  In fact, Abraham and Sarah did name their fourth children, Jacob, and the custom is to name after a relative that died.  It would make sense for Abraham to name a child after his father.  With this mystery uncovered, I now know the names of my great great grandparents, which was the only set of great great grandparents I did not know.

I want to thank Kaye, Sherri V., and others from the Tracing the Tribe Facebook group who are always willing to help solve a genealogy mystery.

Oy Vey Rosie Rosenberg!
Did Great Aunt Celia Die From the Spanish Flu?
Update About My Grandfather’s Mysterious Brother Jacob
My Grandfather’s Mysterious Family is Slowly Unveiling
Mysteries, Mysteries, Mysteries: The Continuing Saga of My Grandfather’s Family

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Another Quest Completed!

29 May

Great Grandpa Abraham Shlomo Grave

One of my genealogy goals is to find the graves of all my great grandparents who are buried in the United States.  Five are buried in the USA with four for sure in the New York, New Jersey metro area. Three of my great grandparents died in Europe, two during the Shoah, so finding their burial sites is impossible.

Since I live in the middle of the country it is difficult to search cemeteries on the east coast. But luckily for me I have willing helpers!  I truly appreciate my family who understand my quest.

Last year during Covid, one of my first cousins went to Washington Cemetery in New York and took photos of my Goldman great grandparents.   (See blog below.). In my mind he was the ideal person to search for the graves, since is named for our great grandfather, with the Hebrew name, Baruch Lev.  It was perfectly apropos that he went to find the graves.

Now it was my brother’s turn.  My brother’s Hebrew name is Avraham Sholmo for my Szenk/Shenk/Schenk great grandfather.   Our great grandfather was born with the name Shlomo/Solomon. But when he was a child he became very ill.  His parents gave him a second name, Avraham, to keep the Angel of Death from finding him.

Usually, the names given to fool the Angel of Death were names like Chaim and Chaya, which mean life. The idea was to confuse the Angel of Death because he would not be able to find a child with a different name.  This superstition said changing the child’s name would save him/her.

In any case my great grandfather’s Hebrew name was changed, but his legal name remained Solomon, or Szlama, as he was known in Poland.  His birthdate was September 1874 and he died in 1942. My great grandfather came to the USA in 1936 along with my great aunt. It was the work of my grandparents to get as many people out of Europe that they could. Unfortunately, it was only these two that they were able to actually bring over.

At first my great grandfather lived with my grandparents.  But, although they had a kosher bakery and kept kosher, my grandmother did not cover her hair, and they did not follow the rules as they did in Europe.  So my great grandfather moved into a Hebrew Home for the Aged

We did have the name of the cemetery where he was supposedly buried. I think my mother’s first cousin told us.  My brother took over the job of finding the grave.  He contacted the King Solomon Memorial Park in Passaic asking about our grandfather. (I do find it interesting and coincidental that Solomon was buried in the King Solomon Cemetery.)  The response was positive, our great grandfather was buried in the Tuber Section through a gate that says Welloner Benevolent Assn. 

The grave had the correct date of death.  There is no date for his birth, probably because no one knew it.  We thought he was born in 1870, but his Visa paperwork said 1874.  However, the age on the stone matches what his age would have been when he died, 68 years old.

The staff at the cemetery even emailed my brother a map to the grave, which was exactly where my brother was told to look.  Not only that, the cemetery and the gravesite were in excellent condition.  So many old cemeteries are not kept up.  Thank you to the King Solomon Memorial Park for keeping these graves in excellent shape.

My brother took photos of the entrance to the cemetery, the gate to the section and the grave itself. He also looked for other family members, but did not find them. Then he left three stones on the grave. This is the way to show that we remember and honor his memory.

https://yivo.org/Folklore-of-Ashkenaz?gclid=EAIaIQobChMI0NL84bX59wIVfW1vBB1sGgIMEAMYASAAEgKhzfD_BwE

A Quest Completed! Thanks to My Cousin!

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