Archive | May, 2025

Renewing A Family Connection: My Mother’s Day Gift

21 May

While in Isarel, I finally renewed a family connection which started 50 years ago. When I was 20, I met two survivors of the Shoah. They were married to sisters before the war. The sisters perished in the Shoah, but the two men remained connected for the rest of their lives.

I have written about both of these men before, (Lieb) Zissel Feuer and Shalom Hollander.  Both were distant cousins of my grandfather. But their wives were his first cousins.   I wrote about meeting Zissel and Shalom and what happened to them during and after the war, and a bit about my contact with them in Israel between 1974-76. (See blogs below.). Over the years my perception of the two changed, as I learned more about their lives.

Now I have a different story to share, because I have met Shalom’s oldest son Chaim, as well as the great nephew of his first wife, who is also my third cousin, Jeff, and his daughter.

For me it was a meeting that completed a story.  For them, I hope I was able to fill in stories about the family and answer question about the family before the war.  As we shared our stories, I could see where my knowledge and theirs combined and differed.  I spoke about meeting Zissel at the bakery in Tel Aviv across from the Shuk HaCarmel.   Chaim smiled while I told my stories about meeting Zissel there each time I came to Tel Aviv.  Chaim, of course, knew the bakery and even Zissel’s address.  Although I had been at his apartment several times, I did not remember the address.  But we had other shared memories. 

I think when I talked about the bakery, Chaim knew then that I was really a relative.  I really had met Zissel. I don’t think he thought I was lying , but he had never heard of me, yet there I was a family member from the USA, unknown to him. Also when I told him about meeting his father, how elegant he seemed.  And Chaim agreed, his dad had that old world charm.

Chaim actually made me feel better about Zissel. I knew he did not have a family.  Shalom was not related to him at all, once their wives died.  Shalom. remarried.  Zissel never did.  But Chaim told me that Zissel was always part of Shalom’s family. He came to be with them for all the haggim, the holidays.  That eased my heart.  Really, I am tearing up even now.  For me Zissel was such a sad soul. So to know he was not alone, helped.

We talked about the importance of what Ziseel and Shalom did after the war to help others from Mielec who survived and to keep the memory of those who were murdered. Shalom purchased the land where a mass burial of 800 Jews were buried and put up a fence and a marker.  Both men also testified against those who were the murderers, as Zissel had done for the murderer of my great grandmother, his aunt by marriage.  Our discussion filled in so many blanks for me.

Chaim and his wife gave me memoirs written by both Shaom and his second wife, Ita, about what happened during the war.

I in turn could tell them about those who made it to the United States before the war.

How Julius/Judah/Yidel Amsterdam, my grandfather’s uncle, came first.  As other relatives came to the New York/New Jersey area, he gave them a choice. You can be a butcher or a baker.  There was a cousin who was a butcher, and Uncle Yidel was a baker.  My grandfather chose to be a baker.  Chiam laughed as I told the story, because his uncle who went to the states became a butcher.  I said he was probably helped by my great uncle Yidel as well.

With Jeff, I could talk about his great uncle Morris, who lived in Helena, Montana.  My grandfather always stayed in touch with his first cousin.  I knew one of this sons because when I moved to Kansas, they gave me Jack’s phone number. He lived in Denver.  To my grandfather and his cousin Morris, this was close enough. We never actually met, but we spoke several times.

For me I have a feeling of completion.  When I found out about these relatives, through the research of Izabela S.  I knew I had to see them when I was in Israel visiting my daughter.  They lived quite a distance.  But my daughter said that this was my Mother’s Day gift.  It was the one thing I really wanted to do.  So we took the long drive from Holon to a small Kfar near Netanya.

Over the years of my research I have found out how the members of my family were murdered during the Shoah.  I know how a small numbered survived.  I know that they are not forgotten.  I am not the only who keeps their memory alive within the family.  And there are people like Izabela in Poland, who also work to keep the memory of the  Jewish population alive.

I never thought I would ever want to go to Trzciana or Mielec.  My grandfather never wanted to go back there after his family was murdered.  But now I do want to go. I what to see where they lived. Where Shalom and Zissel created a Jewish community after the war. Where the Amsterdam group hid in the nearby forest. The town where my great grandmother was murdered. The mass grave where my great aunts are probably buried.

But most of all I am so glad that I found out what that Zissel and Shalom did after the war.  I, as a young woman, saw both Zissel and Shalom as such sad people talking about Death.  I did not hear the stories about what they did to give people a reason to LIVE after the war. And to create a place of memory for those murdered.

I now know that Shalom and his wife, who was also a survivor from Mielec, had four children, a girl who survived whom they adopted and three sons.  Chaim and his wife have seven children, 40 grandchildren and 19 great grandchildren so far. 

I know that Zissel was not alone.  That Zissel and Shalom stayed connected throughout their lives.  I also know that Zissel died in Holon.  I think he might be buried there. So next time I am in Israel, I hope to find his grave and put place a rock of remembrance on his matzevot.

Bomb Shelters Versus Tornado Shelters

7 May

Since my experience with the air raid sirens going off my second day in Israel, I have a new Israeli obsession: Bomb Shelters.

It really is an easy obsession for me to have because living in the Midwest has lead me to a minor obsession with tornado shelters. Each time we have purchased a house, I have looked carefully through the basement looking for the ideal storm shelter. Lowest level, center of house or totally underground, no windows, close to a staircase (staircases are built extra strong) and nothing heavy overhead. For example, you do not want to be sitting in a tornado shelter under a baby grand piano or a refrigerator.

I can almost hear my favorite weather man, Gary, go through his tornado ‘rant’: children who are home alone, do not worry, just go to the lowest level, small, center most room in the house, no windows. This might not be his exact words, but they echo in my mind.

So it is easy for me to transfer my intense concern about tornado shelters to the essential concern for a bomb shelter.

In Israel most people live in apartment buildings. The old ones were not built with bomb shelters. Instead when the sirens go off, the people sit in their staircases…center most area of the house, no windows, reinforced concrete. A relative safe place to sit through a barrage of rockets or bombs, I guess. As I wrote in an earlier blog, my daughter’s apartment has a Momad, a room in her apartment built of extra thick walls, reinforced concrete, special window which has a thick metal plate that sides out and a thick metal door. It is easy to get to and somewhat safer than the rest of the rooms.

But what do you do when you are outside and you need to take shelter. Well there is a system. My daughter took me on a walk to explain sheltering when out side. First she suggested that I hide under an apartment building. In Israel most apartment buildings have car parking underneath and the first apartments are on the ‘second floor.’

She said, “Go to the North or West side of the house and take cover there. Those sides are safer.” She also told me to try the door. If it was unlocked just go in. “What! to a building where I don’t know anyone?” “Of course,” she responded. “During a siren of course they want you to come in.” Or if I am near a store, just go in.

I have to admit that for a tornado siren, we go to the north and east side of the basement. The storms usually come from the southwest, so I do have to change that orientation. And although I would not run into a stranger’s house during a tornado, I definitely have been known to enter a store I was near by when the tornado sirens went off.

But the best is to be near a bomb shelter and go into it. In Israel, the government takes bomb shelters seriously! And there are many community bomb shelters throughout the country. This is definitely why, even thought tens of thousands of rockets, drones, bombs, and missiles, have been launched towards Israel, tens of thousands of people have not been killed. Instead they had the ability to take shelter from the attacks and be somewhat safe.

Just as we in the Midwest know that in many public buildings there are signs to lead us to the tornado shelter, and so even though we have many horrendous tornados, the death toll has gone down over the years.

After my daughter pointed out where to hide under a building, we walked the two blocks to the little strip shopping area near her apartment. In the back was the entrance to the shelter. It is near a staircase, in the center of the building. Gary the weatherman would be so happy. Bomb shelters are like tornado shelters in many ways!!

As we continued on our walk along the streets and alleys of Holon, we walked through many small parks. Within a one mile radius of my daughter’s apartment building are dozens of small parks, day care centers and schools. Located in the center of many of them are bomb shelters. Which makes sense, because children cannot run as quickly as adults. So best to have the shelter close at hand. What I really liked about the shelters is that the outsides are colorfully decorated to make them look cheerful and part of the fun of the park. In Holon, I think the same artist decorated most of them.

I thought about how difficult it would be for children to stop playing to run into the shelter, hide for ten minutes or so before coming out. And then I thought back to when my children were young. They NEVER argued when there was a tornado warning. When the sirens sounded, we all immediately went downstairs to the shelter. Sometimes they grabbed a cat if they could. But there was NEVER an argument. Never a discussion. Never rebellion. Taking shelter was the immediate goal. And then when the danger was over, we left the shelter. Sometimes it was 15 to 20 minutes. And sometimes we were down there for an hour or more. But when it was over, life just resumed. So I have to assume that children in Israel have the same response to a siren for a bomb attack as my children had for a tornado warning. Don’t argue, take shelter.

I do have to admit one caveat to taking shelter: Dads and husbands.. When my husband was home during a storm and tornado warning, sometimes he would stand outside for a while and watch the weather. This to me was not the brightest thing to do. But as many know, you a watch lots of videos of tornados heading towards someone’s home, and then finally someone yells, “We need to go inside now.” In Israel the same type of poeple stand outside and take videos of the Iron Dome rockets intercepting the missiles or bombs sent into Israel. I don’t quite understand this desire to watch in real time. But I do admit watching these videos myself.

But there is a major difference between a tornado siren and an air raid sirens. The intent. For a tornado you have to watch out for the debris. For a rocket/missile you have to watch out for the shrapnel. Similar but not exactly the same. Nature doesn’t take aim at your home because it hates you, it just is. While bombs falling around you are sent purposefully to kill you. That does change the dynamic of sheltering.

Although tornado shelters are here to stay, people should not have to have bomb shelters in their homes or their play grounds. Humans cannot stop tornados, but they can stop bombing each other with intent to kill. It is time for it to end.

Israel Version 2025

4 May

I noticed a difference the first evening in my daughter’s apartment in Holon, just south of Tel Aviv. We were unpacking my suitcases and going through the items I had brought for her, when I noticed the sounds of airplanes or jets in the sky.

I said, “I don’t remember so many planes flying overhead to the airport.

My daughter: “Mom, those are not commercial airlines.”

Me: “oh”

Then she added, “It is Shabbat, commercial airlines don’t fly. But military is exempt.”

In the morning I learned that the IDF had bombed part of Syria to protect the Druze population.

The peaceful view in Holon one hour after the siren.

I was not unaware of what it was like to live in Israel. I had studied in Israel for a year attending Hebrew University from July 1974 to July 1975. I had some experience with war time in Israel. The Yom Kippur War had been the previous October 1973. Most of the students I met had survived that war. Even the ones who did not have physical scars, had mental ones. And we all knew to report any backpack or bag that looked suspicious or was unattended. When on a bus, the driver always checked to make sure every backpack or bag had an owner on the bus. I had heard explosions and been to areas perhaps I should not have been to with my friends who had been called up for reserve duty so many years ago.

I had been in Israel with my children and parents in December 2004/January 2005 for a two-week trip. Israel was on high alert. It was in the process of leaving Gaza and turning it over to the Egyptian/Palestinians who were living there. The settlers who had to be removed were protesting. We had to avoid some places. And at times we saw the movement of tanks heading toward the Gaza envelop. I wonder what would have happened if Israel had not left Gaza. Would it had been better if Hamas had never been elected as the government there? If Israel had just kept its oversight? I know that the government thought/hoped this would bring peace. Unfortunately it brought 20 years of bombing, hate and then pogrom.

My husband and I were in Israel in November 2008 for a medical meeting where my husband was a presenter. We stayed after the meeting to visit our daughter in Beer Sheva where she was a graduate student at Ben Gurion University. One day the three of us went to an Air Force Museum. The young soldier who was our tour guide was a little tense. I noticed that lots of jets were taking off and landing. I asked the guide a question about it. Her response was they were doing drills. When we left the museum, I turned to my daughter and said something is going to happen. Before we left Israel, a few days later, I told my daughter to be careful. To pay attention to what was happening, I was extremely worried. Six weeks later was Cast Lead, Israel’s response to the continued bombings from Gaza/Hamas.

In the summer of 2016, a few months before my daughter and son-in-law got married, the couple purchased an apartment in Holon. “Mom,” she said, “you will be happy to know that our apartment has a ‘mamad’, a bomb shelter.” “I am happy your apartment has one,” I responded. “But I am sad you have to have one.”

In November 2022 I was in Israel with my daughter when the government tested the siren alarm system. It was the first time I had been in Israel that I heard the sirens go off. Although it was just a test, it made me aware that my daughter actually used her mamad. Something I still feel very sad about.

I have been on the phone with my daughter several times when she has had to take shelter. When the sirens were going off. Once when she was at the University, when I was on the phone with her, I actually heard the bomb hit, it was so close. And just last week, before I came here, we were talking when the sirens went off and she and her husband ran to their shelter. There have been ballistic missiles from Yemen and the Houthis for two years now. These were so large, that even when they were shot down, the shrapnel could cause damage.

I arrived at Ben Gurion Airport on May 2. This morning, 40 hours after my arrival, on May 4, 2025, I had my own mamad experience. This morning after they went to work, I planned to take a walk. But at 9:22 am, just as I was preparing to leave, the sirens went off. It was not a drill or a test. It was the real thing. Everything outside stopped. I went into the mamad. Here is what ensued as per our text conversation:

“The sirens are going off. how do I close the window?” Me

“Go to your room. There’s a metal slide on the right side. Pull it hard.” my daughter

“I cannot get the slide. The sirens stopped.” Me

“Or just stay away from the window. Stay in the room 5 minutes.” My daughter

“Ok” me

“Looks like the Houthis, so there’s probably nothing near us.” My daughter

“Ok I don’t think I will go for a walk right now.” Me

“Ok. Usually it’s just one.” My Daughter

“Well I was just going to go when the sirens went off. And I don’t know where the shelters are. Cars are starting to move. But it is still silent.” Me

“Yeah, the sirens only go off for a bit and turn off. But they say to stay inside 10 minutes. But for Houthis really 5 is fine.“ My daughter

“Everyone is still in shelters. All the construction stopped.” Me

“Everyone is leaving my shelter now. in Tel Aviv Everyone is outside.” My daughter

“We can walk tonight. You can show me where the shelters are.” Me

“Ok we’ll go on a walk tonight.”My daughter

“Sounds good. I hadn’t thought of that before. It would have freaked me out walking by myself… when the sirens went off.” Me

A bit later I found out that the missiles hit Ben Gurion Airport, 16 miles from Holon. Several people were injured. Many flights have been cancelled for 24 hours. A friend of mine, who lives in Tel Aviv, texted me. “Luckily you arrived before today’s mess at the airport. “Oy yes,” I responded.

Back in Holon, the construction is continuing. I hear the voices of children outside from the neighboring schools. I hear jets overhead. And I see commercial airplanes. The sky is a beautiful blue color. It is a lovely day, only 70 degrees. Life goes on. Just an hour later, and no one even thinks of the short time in the bomb shelters.

Israel Version 2025. Keep living.

https://www.ynetnews.com/article/rkkfwtvglg