On September 2, my brother and his wife will be married for 38 years. Their Labor Day weekend wedding was notable for several reasons: his was the first wedding in our immediate family; he got married on our youngest sister’s 21st birthday; the drama of the dress my Mom wore to the wedding.
Why would a dress be so memorable? Here is what happened. My sister in law chose orange, yellow and beige as her wedding colors. My mother did not want to wear beige, as she felt it was too close to the bride’s white dress. But she could not find a dress anywhere, in a color she liked. She decided to have one made specifically for her.
She chose an orange/peach color fabric, with a lace inset at the top. As a teacher in West New York, she knew many people. Someone recommended a good dressmaker. The dress was well made, but it looked absolutely horrid on my Mom. I can still see the dress, even though she never wore it to the wedding, just tried it on for us.
My husband and I, who were engaged at the time, arrived in New Jersey about four days before the wedding. That evening, my Mom tried the dress on for all of us. My Dad, my sister and I stared at the dress, without words. Mom looked horrendous. The color was WRONG! It took all color from her face. The style was also terrible. She looked like she was wearing a nightgown to go to bed, NOT a gown to wear to a wedding.
My sister and I were stunned. We were silent for a few minutes. We actually had no words, no way to tell her how terrible this dress looked. Mothers and daughters have a connection, from our silence, and probably the looks on our faces, she could tell. “It looks horrible, doesn’t it,” she asked…or something like that.
Then the tears started. The wedding was just four days away. What would she do? We had a major disaster on our hands! My sister and I were up in an instant. We would do something!
My father was somewhat calm. “DO not worry. You will find a dress.” He was positive. But he was also insistent that she no longer tried to save money. This called for emergency shopping, and we knew the perfect store: Gail Browns, located on 58th and Bergenline Avenue. (Thanks North Bergen friends for this info.) It was a high-class dress shop near by. A store that we never shopped at because the prices were way too high for us. We usually went to Little Marcy’s, occasionally Corduroy Village, but never Gail Browns.
The next morning, as soon as it opened, my sister, my Mom and I went to the dress store. With in minutes, the sales lady brought over a beautiful beige dress with a brown belt. It was the same exact color as the tuxedos the men were going to wear. Mom put it on. Stunning.
Mom in her lovely dress stands in the middle surrounded by my grandmothers, my sister and me.
Yes, there were just a few minor alterations. The hem had to be shortened; the belt loops moved; an extra snap on the bodice. But the seamstress knew it was an emergency situation. This was Friday. The wedding was Sunday. By late afternoon, the dress was complete. I believe they even dyed shoes for her!
The Dress Fiasco was over. The discarded dress disappeared. Never to be commented on ever again.
Mom looked wonderful at the wedding of her oldest child. She looks lovely in all the photos. There is a picture of my Mom and Dad dancing that I can still see in my mind. It was a great dress.
I missed Mom when I purchased the dress for my daughter’s wedding last year, 37 years later. She also got married on Labor Day Weekend. My Mom is no longer with us. She did not get to go dress shopping for this wedding.
Instead, my daughter and I went shopping, and narrowed the choice to two dresses, which I brought home. Later that day my sister arrived from New Jersey. I tried on both dresses. I took the advise of my sister and daughter who both loved one specific dress. They said it was me. The other dress, which was grey drained me of color. Another dress fiasco was averted. I wore the lavender dress that they loved.
Now my sister is facing this hurdle. Her daughter is getting married next June. I know she realizes that I will be there to make sure that her dress is the perfect one. There will be no tears four days before another wedding because the mother’s dress is horrendous. No more dress fiascos ever!
Another blog about shopping: https://zicharonot.wordpress.com/2014/03/10/shopping-on-the-avenue-i-dont-mean-fifth-i-mean-bergenline/
zicharonot 
Weddings do cause a lot of stress. I was lucky to find a dress I loved for my daughter’s wedding online and then a local store carried it. It was probably the only non-stressful part of her wedding planning!
I was lucky as well. We found my dress in the first store we shopped at. Weddings and stress are synonyms!
I actually found my own wedding dress in the first store I went to with my mother and aunt back in 1976. It was the first one I tried on. My mother and aunt forced me to try on others—how could I just pick a dress that way? But in the end I wanted that first dress. I guess I’ve always known what will make me feel comfortable and appropriate.
So true. My mom always said that you have to try it on. What it looks like on a hanger is different than how it looks on !
LOL! So did mine! 🙂
Weddings are so stressful, the clothing especially. I am not looking forward to that phase of life – mother of the groom. But the grandkids, that will be great. 😉
Absolutely. There is so much emotion involved in a wedding. And the emotions add to the stress for it to be the perfect day!