For my Mother’s yahrzeit, I decided to tackle the photo albums again. But this time, I went to a album of photos I put together of loose photos that I found after she passed away. They were not in an album, just in a large manila envelope. This time I had some success!
There were two groups of photos labeled Summer 1944 and Summer 1946. I knew the photos had to be taken in Kauneonga Lake, Sullivan County, New York, as that is where my grandparents had a small bungalow colony when I was a growing up. But these photos are from before the area was built up.
So I have to back track a bit. You know when you are a child, you really do not think about your grandparents and parents as people who have friends. They are your parents and grandparents, and they take care of you. I never analyze who was their friends or why. Or even how long they had been friends. It just was. And that leads to my discovery.
Among the photos from 1944 was one small one labeled Mr. Fink, in my mother’s handwriting. This was a good clue. Up in the Catskills was another bungalow colony, much bigger, called Fink’s Kauneonga Park Bungalows, owned by Mr. and Mrs. Fink. I knew they were good friends of my grandparents. But I guess I never realized they knew each other in 1944, when my grandmother was just 38 years old and grandfather was 44. This means they were long-term good friends. It sort of shocked me.

My Mom on the left, Carolyn next to her.
However, there were many other photos in the piles. My Mom was in many of them, as was my grandparents and several other young adults, including a girl named Carolyn and boy named, Bob. Carolyn and my Mom were together in many photos. Who was she? I did not know that name. But obviously they were good friends. They were even holding hands in one photo.
Luckily, I am Facebook friends with one granddaughter of the Finks, and I have contact with another granddaughter. I took some photos of the photos and sent them through messenger to the granddaughters.
PAY DIRT: Carolyn and Bob were brother and sister and the younger children of Mr. and Mrs. Fink. Carolyn and my Mom were the same age: obviously friends. To be able to identify two unknowns made me so happy!!!
But there was more. Because once I knew who they were and how long they knew each other, other connections made sense. Mr. and Mrs. Fink! My grandmother would walk to visit her at least once a week. My sister or I often went along. When I was older and needed a job, Mrs. Fink got me a job as a mothers’ helper at her bungalow colony. My brother worked at their day camp. And my sister, also worked there answering the telephone! Then she became a mothers’ helper.
The concession stand, that was close to our house, was a place where I often went to get a few items for my Mom. Whenever we went in, my Mom would have a long conversation with the woman working there. I found out that was Mrs. Fink’s other daughter, the mother of my Facebook friends. Wow. That made sense. I remember one time Mom was sick and she sent me over there to get something without money. I was so embarrassed. But they were fine. They said Mom could take care of it later.

My sister and I think Blacky was Mrs. Fink’s dog. My grandparents never had one.
But the biggest mystery solved was Carolyn. Why did I not know of this girl, who was my Mom’s friend. I asked, Did she marry? What was her name? Maybe I knew her by her married name. And I found out she had medical issues and lived away from home in Arizona! BINGO. Whenever my Mom walked over to see Mrs. Fink, there was always a conversation about someone who lived far away. That must have been her!
For me the photos from my mother and father are mysteries that need to be solved. Whenever a mystery is solved I am elated. I am thankful I have a connection with Mr. and Mrs. Fink’s granddaughters and for their help solving the puzzle.
Wonderful! Did you find out whatever happened to Carolyn? Did your mother stay in touch with her? They obviously were once very close.
Yes. She married and had a son. Lived in Florida.
This is wonderful! And I learned a new word – yahrzeit. What a lovely tradition. How many of your relatives do you do this for? Is it something reserved for close family or does it include more distant generations?
You do it for close family: parents, siblings, spouse, child (god forbid). But can do it for others as well. I do my grandparents and some others. We do it once a year on the anniversary of their death.
Thank you for explaining a bit. It would be horrible to bury a child wouldn’t it? That is on my mind today because of my own post.