It has been a crazy three days. It has been stressful and at times unreal. But what I do know is that I am a mother of a daughter and son-in-law who live in Israel. More than that I am the mother of a woman who is 8-months pregnant.
My friends and family know that I am anxious, stressed and somewhat neurotic right now. They are reaching out with support and love. I am trying to continue with my daily life, but no matter what I do, my brain and my heart are in Israel.
I feel like I need to share, to vent, to emote, at times to scream. I mean, really! I was just in Israel. How could this happen! I HAVE to get back to Israel in six weeks!
Even my cousins who live in Israel or have their own children in Israel have reached out to me. One cousin, originally from Wichita, asked if I was okay. She told me that her mother needed tranquilizers during the Gulf War. Makes sense to me. Aunt Barbara I understand your angst now!
Then another cousin, who I also saw in Israel, and who recently became a grandmother for the second time, texted: “Stay strong.” My response, “I am trying! You too!” She is so Israeli. Her response “Children are strong. They are lions. And we are all warriors!”
I used that line this Shabbat when I was asked to read the Prayer for Israel. I told everyone to remember we are all warriors!
We will survive, as we always do. I believe that. In the last two years its especially important to believe. WE cannot cave to hate.
My daughter recently helped me see the reality. We communicate several times each day now. This What’s App Chat was classic.
I start off: “Perhaps when you are in the mamad (bomb shelter), you should stay away from the window. (Back story: When they purchased this apartment she told me, “You will be happy to know the apartment has a bomb shelter.” My response, “I am happy it does, but sad it has to have one.” Now I really am happy snd extremely sad.)
“No one who was in a shelter died,” my daughter typed. “And Home Front Command specifically said that the number one safest place to be is in your mamad. So that is where I will be.” (There have about 30 who have died so far and hundreds who have been injured.)
“My heart hurts that you and all of Israel have to go through this. But especially pregnant women. (Okay I should have said children as well.).” Then she informs me that one of her WhatsApp group of pregnant woman gave birth on Friday. Both are fine. But oy vey what a day. So as a mom I typed (as if I had any control) “Wonderful! But best not to go into labor during a missile attack. Just remember that.” I got a thumbs up and “Yeah not Ideal.”
In Kansas people go into labor during tornados and snowstorms. It snowed the day she was born. But somehow giving birth during a bombing seems wrong.
The conversation continued as we got into what I call the immigrant response that was handed down from her great grandparents. My grandparents were both from Europe. They kept jewels, gold and money hidden in the basement. My siblings and I inherited a lot of jewelry. I keep my share in the bank. But we know it is there if needed.
Don’t worry is her usual response. But this time it was a little different.
“Passports and jewelry are in the mamad as well,” she tells me. “A friend and I were talking about the first things to go into the mamad and I was like passports and jewelry. Then came food. Then extra clothes.” (This is what I call European Jewish escape response.). I added, “What about water and a pot to pee in.” (Someone had to remind them.)
“Then I was talking to another friend and her German boyfriend,” she typed. “I said something about diamonds, and he said “NO, Gold is better.” I said, “ok, I guess a real German would know what bribes Germans were most likely to take so I’ll be sure to include gold. Not that Germans are the problem right now.” (Definitely Shoah inspired response based on knowledge about our family who was murdered and those that survived.)
I told her I was sad that she had to think about what she needs to keep in the mamad.
“It is sad, but it’s also kind of our history. Jews – the original doomsday preppers,” she typed. “Gotta be ready to escape and bribe your way to safety.”
Yes, true, I wrote. But at least you have a shelter. I have to think of what Hamas did to the Gazans. Tunnels just for militants, the rest left to suffer the consequences of wars Hamas starts.
Unfortunately, perhaps it is our millenniums of dealing with hatred that has made us able to survive. Perhaps being the original doomsday preppers is good.
zicharonot 